Greetings sir/madam, I believe you are in the possession of a doll that bears a striking resemblance to me? And you have been placing things of a pointy nature in this doll hoping to cause me pain for your entertainment? Further, you are concentrating your efforts on a particular body part because you are a sadistic turd? I implore you to grant my foot a day free from injury. Please congratulate yourself on a job well done as my foot

While I was retrieving supplies for dinner, a tube of tomato paste performed a triple flip combination and positioned itself perfectly in the air to deliver an excruciating blow to my middle toe. And the specificity of the attack intrigued me. Of all the locations on the foot, the tomato paste chose the middle toe for its assault. I suspect a spirited session of trash talking induced the attack. Whatever the reason, the tomato paste elicited the support of a