If birds could talk….

Keeping in mind that our local birds’ nest was quite a bit more roomy just 5 days ago (Exhibit A), I imagine the conversation these days is quite a bit different since the nest is stuffed to capacity (Exhibit B below).

NOTE: They are all named George. For the backstory, see this post.

Exhibit B: Nest Overflow
Exhibit B: Nest Overflow

George I: Could I be more blurry? I’m in the foreground. I should be the center of attention with my pretty eye all highlighted. Geez, lady, you suck at photography. You should probably donate that bad boy and do us all a favor. Plus we are sick of you poking your stupid camera all up in our biz every few days. Get. a. life.

George III: Hey, do you guys hear something. George hears something. Is that the cicadas? George is pretty sure it’s the cicadas. They sound like that. Yes, they do. At least George thinks they do. George hasn’t actually met one of them.

George II: Would you two stop touching me?!? I’ve got your smelly bodies all up in my grill 24/7 and I’m now covered in your stank. I can’t get a moment’s peace with the chattering moron over here and the constant nightmare of your stupid feathers in my beak and eye. I seriously can’t take this anymore. I am officially no longer afraid of trying out this flying thing.

George III: Are you guys hungry? You heard the cicadas, right? George heard the cicadas. George hears them right now. Are they talking to George? George thinks they might be. George wishes George understood what they are saying. George is getting hungry. Hungry hungry hungry.

George II: Would you please shut up about the cicadas. And no, you don’t hear them right now. Also, you just ate, you fool.

George III: George sure does hear them. Right now right now. George thinks they sound tasty. George would like to try a cicada. You bet George would. Do you think we might eat one of those cicadas? George bets they crunch when you eat them. Wait, how big are those things? Are they big? They’re big aren’t they. Oh no, George is going to have a nightmare about giant cicadas now. George just knows it.

George II: Serenity now. <sigh>

Bird’s got his/her siblings. No vacancies at The Nest.


OK, full disclosure. We had birds last year and the year before. I bore them ill will. I’m just gonna come clean on that. But it’s because they built their nest on the top ledge of the covered front porch and, as my brother hilariously put it, used our front porch “as their personal latrine.” I believe they used us for target practice though I’m pleased to report that at no time were they successful in hitting us. Nevertheless, by the time they moved out, the front porch looked very nasty indeed. Matthew spent a lot of time cleaning that mess up, and we made sure to remove all evidence of their presence so that when they swung by this year to find a nesting place they might forget about the success of the previous location. We made sure to give glowering looks every time we entered and exited that door lest they be scouting, and when we saw a bird, we made sure to quickly explain that the ledge over the front porch was a death trap location for baby birds due to the new cat we had recently acquired and installed nearby. So, when they made their nest in the holly tree this year and we were able to enjoy these little guys while avoiding their excrement? Happy days are here again! And now, I want to pick the three of them up and hug them and pet them and squeeze them and make them mine. And name them George I, II and III.