To Do: Buy Dream Journal UGH! I had a dream that was so engrossing, so compelling, so alarming, and, also, so COMPLETELY realized in its plot, pacing, and impact that I woke up from it energized for 20 minutes thinking about the novel I was going to write based on it. And then? I fell back asleep. Without writing down the outline of it to jog my memory in the morning. Do you know what I remember about it now? One

Anna and I did a “podcast” and it’s interesting. Yeah. It’s not a podcast. We know this. It’s us recording ourselves chattering about utter nonsense. No studio. No microphone. No legitimate equipment or software whatsoever. So, you know, listen at your own risk. Peace.

I believe this [Ed. Note: severely edited and condensed for your sanity] conversation will provide the required evidence to show that my brain has a twin. And that leads me to believe that there are other hosts out there walking around with a grey, squishy skull resident who behaves in the same way as mine and, apparently, Jon’s. Yikes. We are all clearly siblings separated at birth and ruled by our skull residents. Shhh, don’t let them hear us. Greg,

I mentioned some weirdness around my kid’s school nurse. And people, the story continues. My kid noticed the nurse strolling around at recess. She may have been sniffing the air around the kids. I can’t say for certain. I’m guessing she didn’t notice if any of the kids were holding their privates in agony with an obvious need to use the facilities. (That part will make sense in a bit.) The purpose for the nurse’s recess visit became apparent later as the

[Ed. Note: Don’t grade me on this one, people. There was no editing AT ALL. There’s usually SOME editing. A smidge of editing. At least a glance at my completed post before I actually publish. This time? Nothing. There will be blood mistakes.] Yeah. I could have just used a sarcasm tag at the end of “cherries” in that title, but I really needed to get the image of a rollercoaster in your head to explain that there are highs and

So your kid wants to write a personal message on all her valentines this year, but that one kid keeps calling her miscreant and she’s not really feeling the love on that one, huh? No worries. I’ve got some very nice entries below for your kid to use. No charge. Seriously. You are a person that I know. Happy Valentine’s Day! You’re dressed in clothes. That naked dream didn’t come true today. Yay! Happy Valentine’s Day! The girl that sits