I haven’t performed a car concert in far too long.

I used to perform car concerts two or three times a week depending on commutes and how inspired I was feeling by my music selection. But now? I’m down to a measly once or twice a quarter. I travel with kids too much now. I’d have to go with the kid-appropriate rock which severely limits my music choices. But I could do it if there weren’t other issues to be addressed when the kids are present. Anna’d probably be pretty chill about it and join in.  But JT is in middle school. It is imperative that you DO NOT UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES do anything to draw attention to yourselves when you have a middle schooler in tow. And a proper car concert may draw the attention of fellow travelers though ideally you try to avoid that as much as possible so it doesn’t inhibit your performance. When I drop him off anywhere, I have to pretend as if he is a random child I just met to whom I offered transportation. I’m allowed to briefly and quietly say bye as the door shuts. I am also allowed to smile at him as long as there are no witnesses. I can’t complain, however, because he’s still as affectionate as ever when we are safely out of sight of other kids.

When I don’t have kids in the car, I often have a dog in there who will no doubt freak out if I give a proper car concert. For starters, volume is very important and she’s not having that. Also, sometimes there’s exuberant gesturing and I might even break out into some limited-movement dancing, and she’ll take that as an invitation to crowd surf. And then I’ll have to be the sole crowd member and support her stupid crowd-surfing-body, but I’m performing! I’m not supposed to be part of the crowd. Also, I’m driving. I have to pay attention to those duties in addition to my performance, so I can’t have the added distraction of a crowd-surfing dog.

If it’s not the kids or the dog holding me back, it’s that the jaunt is too short to get a good concert in. I prefer not to hold a concert that has less than 10 good songs to make sure I’ve got enough of my favorites represented to satisfy me until the next one. I guess I could be an opening act, but that gig’s for rookies and I’ve been performing for too many years to go back to that.

I’m not entirely sure what the allure of the car concert is for me. I can hold a concert performance from within my house where I’ve got the freedom to move about freely. Plus there’s the added benefit of not having to worry about spectators. You can really put all you’ve got into it. Attire is optional and you can easily fetch up a microfauxne. But there’s something special about a car concert where you’re on the move and can pretend you’re en route to some spectacular destination while belting out the lyrics to your favorite songs.

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